4am

Sunday morning,4am.
We were there till 4am.
We talked, we shared, we discussed.
There was a time we could not work together,
a time we could not speak to one another,
a time where we could not face one another.

However,
on a Sunday morning,
we sat together,
we talked to one another.
We tried to understand one another,
we appreciated one another.

It was this.
It was just this one thing.
It was just one simple step.

I do not want to keep being that way.
I wanted to keep aside.
To keep people's flaws aside,
and look at the beauty which they possess.
I needed to change. 
I learned that everybody is different,
that everybody is beautiful.
I tried to change.
I put aside my pride,
put aside my ego.
At least,
things are turning around.

We talked about love.
We talked about the past. 
We talked about the conditions of our heart.
We talked about hurt.
We talked about decisions.
But the most painful of all in which we spoke was - Love. 

Love..
It can be sweet like honey but yet poisonous like venom.
But it all takes the sacrifice.
It all takes the commitment.
The feeling is for a moment,
but the decision is yours to make,
the commitment is yours to take.
Taking it up was easy,
but now to put it down is difficult.
When betrayal strikes,
when chances were taken for granted,
when you thought that was right but it was not.
The hurt, unbearable,
the pain, undeniable.
One wrong choice after another.
When memories come searching,
when memories become haunting,
when memories don't fade that easily,
the heartache becomes overwhelming.
Commitment,
perseverance,
understanding,
support,
loyalty,
they are really so difficult.
But they come in a package,
you cannot lose anyone of them.
That's when love really is love.
When you decide to be with someone,
when you decide to accept the heart of a person,
a heart as fragile as thin glass.
Some can play,
some cannot.
I cannot.
A heart is not for playing.
The heart is where you lay your life.
Without a heart,
you live without a life.
When a heart is severely scarred,
a heart becomes stone cold.
You know how to love your own life,
why can't you treasure the life of another person as well?
To treasure is not only to prevent murder,
but also to learn to love without a reason,
without too many expectations.
In which relationship people don't get hurt?
In which relationship people don't get neglected?
In a relationship, the normal life still goes on.
A relationship is a gift.
A gift where you have somebody to stay by your side.
A gift where you can count on someone to listen to you when you desperately needs to pour.
A gift where you encounter different emotions and a learning process.

We can cry,
we can give up,
but at the end of the day,
we still cannot close our heart.
As much as I wanted to,
I know I could not.
I can only try to see the brighter side of things.
I lose you today, I will find another.
Another whom I will be able to love more and appreciate.
Another who is better than you who left.
I will find another until I finally find it right.
So many people,
I might meet the wrong one,
but through the hurt and pain encountered,
I will learn to love the next better.
Love, a God-given gift to all mankind,
we cannot give up loving.
We may walk the paths where we will remember the past,
the memories once sweet to our hearts but now aching us,
but we will look forward,
we will not give up,
we cannot give up.
We need to be stronger,
we need to learn to love better.
Do not sigh over things that are gone,
but start looking forward for things that are to come.
Sighing over the past,
looking backwards,
it stumbles us in holding on to what's better.
Just like driving on a highway,
you cannot look back,
you have to keep looking forward.
You have a destination,
you want to go to somewhere better.
You need to reach a place.
You cannot look back.
When you look back,
you might run into something which you could have prevented from doing so,
you might miss the turning to where you wanted to go.
If you keep thinking of looking back,
you will lose even your life for not driving with full concentration.
Things in life were not made to move backwards,
we build things and invented things,
and almost everything goes forward.
Cellphones become trendier and with more functions,
and we don't invent things to go back to stone age writing on stone tablets.
Cars are driven forward,
cars are never driven backwards on a highway.
People have eyes on the front,
nobody have their eyes on the back.
We naturally walk forward,
we don't walk backwards.
So never look back,
never go back,
always go forward.
You will find better,
you will get better.
Time is not everything,
but the willingness to open the heart once more is the key to everything.


I am trying,
I am melting my stone cold heart.
I am taking one step at a time,
and I will look forward.
There's still a long race ahead,
a long run full of obstacles and challenges till the day I really meet the end.
There will be multiple hurts that will come my way,
but let's take that as a blessing.
A blessing to make the heart stronger than before.
Trees without wind won't grow to be strong,
and sometimes as tiny and weak as grasses,
they can still withstand the strong wind that comes.
Let's be that way,
let's learn to see things in another perspective.
Maybe we will learn something,
and not only remember the negative.
Everybody will have a story behind them,
a story which we feel sad when we share,
we feel disappointed when we speak of it,
but that's what makes each person different.
You know why people say life is unfair?
Because they never weigh what they have and don't with other's.
Life is fair.
You have something different, and another person has something different.
You were not given something, and the other person is not given something else.
Because everybody cannot have the same things.
If everybody has the same things,
nobody will be able to help anybody when something different happens in our life.
Life is full of surprises,
anything can happen any moment.
We need people's experiences to comfort and help us through,
and things change rapidly.
And if everybody has the same thing,
nobody can help anybody.
And if everybody has everything,
we do not have the ability to hold on to the responsibilities of what we have and we should do with it.

Hurts are part and parcel of life,
we just have to learn to embrace it.
The more we fight with it,
the more pain we get.
If we learn to embrace it and learn from it,
we will know how to let it go and live beyond it.
Time will teach,
experience will teach,
people will teach.
Love,
never an easy thing,
be it between lovers or family.
But that's a gift.
That's how we learn to grow.
It's for you to learn from it.
Think about it..
everything that comes with it,
let it be a gift from heaven,
given to all mankind for the better.
It is a gift,
A gift.

Till 4am,
we were there till 4am,
let 4am on a Sunday morning be a turning point for all of us.

4am,
that was another gift heaven sent.